How to Avoid a Dysfunctional Relationship

by | May 15, 2022

The Amber Heard and Johnny Depp courtroom drama has captured all our attention. 

Speaking for myself, I have never been in a court case like I have been in this one. I watched and tried to read the body language, understand the courtroom jargon and keep up with the testimony

But why is it so captivating? Is it the spectacle that the rich and famous have the same problems that many of us go through?

 Or is it that many of us have been in dysfunctional relationships in the past and this gives us a sense of normalcy? 

Whatever it is, hundreds of thousands of people tune in every day to see the theatrics of a very dysfunctional relationship live online.

But, What About Your Relationships?

We have all been in those relationships where we think, “this is so dysfunctional”! “Something is not right here”. “This is not OK!”

Some of us have been in those relationships more than once!

However, being in these types of relationships is not a pure coincidence. I can look back now at some of my previous relationships,  and I can see the many red flags I chose to overlook. 

Eventually, as we all know, these decisions have come back to haunt us.

Woman and man hugging

What About You???

Now, let’s focus on you. If you are looking for a partner or have been dating someone for a short while, look out for the following red flags before you decide to commit on a much deeper level with someone.

Relationship RED Flags 

  • Constant Fights and Conflict- If your relationship is filled with continuous fighting, stress, and tension there is a huge problem. Especially if it is the beginning of a relationship. Relationships are supposed to be about compromise and happiness. Yes, every relationship has issues but if you argue more than you enjoy each other’s company it may be time for a change.
  • Imbalance of Power- If your partner wants to take control of all aspects of your life, this is a clear red flag. You should always have the freedom to do, say, or go wherever you want. Also, watch out for someone who wants to control you “for your own good”. You made great decisions before the relationship and you will after!
  • Blame- In a relationship, both people are responsible for the ups and downs. If you are solely blamed for the issues in the relationship this is a significant red flag. If the other person sees themselves as the savior and you as the villain, this is a significant red flag.
  • Drug Use- If you meet someone who is actively using illegal drugs, realize that this is something you will have to deal with for the long haul. Substance abuse is not a habit that people leave easily and you have to determine whether you want to go through the ups and downs of dealing with someone with a serious addiction.
  • Mental Health Issues- If the person you are interested in has been diagnosed with a mental illness such as schizophrenia or bipolar disorder, realize that those are difficult diagnoses to deal with for the individual and for those around them. There will be ups and downs and relapses due to this medical condition. Understand that this will be a challenging relationship.
  • Compatibility- Many people disregard compatibility as something that is trivial and believes LOVE is the most important aspect of a relationship. While love is essential, knowing what you are looking for in a partner and what you expect from that person is just as important.

If you acquired a master’s degree and are well on your way to your dream job, and your partner is content with working a minimum-wage job and playing video games all day, there will eventually be resentment and anger.

  • Long Distance- Long distance relationships are very hard to navigate. For many people, the idea of living in other states and connecting over the phone and PC can be very romantic, but after a while, people become disillusioned and would like to be with their partner on a consistent basis. In this case, the distance may not make the heart grow fonder.

Remember, there is no such thing as a perfect relationship, we all have to work on our relationships and the baggage that we bring, however, there is no excuse for physical, mental, or emotional abuse!!

For More on how you can be a better version of yourself, and avoid these types of relationships- CLICK HERE

If you need mental health support and services: CLICK HERE

You May Also Be Interested in:

Negative Self-Talk: How To Stop the Madness In Your Head!

WonderMind: Is Selena Gomez’s New Website Right For You?


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