It’s that time of year again when we judge ourselves for what we did or did not do the previous year. Did I not complete enough goals, did I not lose enough weight, did I not cross anything off our bucket list?

All this Sh*t Is Actually Exhausting!

What if the end of the year was just an end and not a culmination of our failures as human beings and our disgust and internal dialogue of self-loathing!!!

But what if, in a perfect world, this is just a reset? Instead of looking back at all our mistakes and shortcomings, we can actually just hit the reset button and work on being exactly who we want to be in 2023. Minus the guilt, self-sabotage, and emotions.

Why don’t we work on being the best versions of ourselves in  2023, that’s it!

Wendy Feeling Frusturated 🙂

The Non-New Years Resolution!!!

Let’s be the best version of ourselves this year. Not who your family, partner, or community wants you to be, but who you want to be!

A month before the New Year last year, I decided I wanted to start a blog. All my usual fears kicked in, who will read it, English is my second language-there are better writers out there, I don’t have time, and I’ve never done this.

However, I am a year in,  and I am more in love with writing than ever before. I had to put aside all my fears and become who I wanted to be!

Below are some steps you can take to become who you want to be in 2023!

Who Do You Want To Be In 2023?

The hardest part in determining who you want to be is taking the time to figure it out. Take a few minutes,  sit by yourself, and take an audit of what part of yourself you want to nurture and help grow this new year. It is the baker inside you begging to come out, or the entrepreneur? Whatever it is make a decision and take action!

Take Action

Taking action is an important step. When I decided I wanted to start a blog, I went online and started doing as much research as I could. Google and youtube were my best friends.

 I also went to my local library and borrowed any books that pertained to blogging.

Initially, all the information you need to start taking action is literally at your fingertips (for free)!

Change Will Be Challenging For You, and Others

Family, friends, and partners are used to a certain version of you, and they are comfortable with that. Once you start dedicating some of your focus and time to the changes you want to make in your life, people may become angry, resentful, or feel threatened. 

Communicate clearly with important individuals in your life about what you are about to embark on,  and what they should expect.

If Someone Doesn’t Like It, Tough!

Realize that when you change who you are it does not only affect you, but people around you, and they will react to the change as well- so be ready for some pushback at times.

Setbacks Are a Normal Part Of Life

If you have a setback, don’t give up. Setbacks are a normal part of life. If you have a bad day or a bad week, know that it does not take away all the work you have done up to that point.  Keep pushing forward.

Brush yourself off and get back to business. 

Imposter Syndrome

This is a biggie! When we choose to embark on something new all our old self-defeating thoughts come back in to try and knock us down.

When I was attending Columbia University, on a daily basis,  I had to fight thoughts of self-defeat and feeling like I did not belong amongst my peers. Many years later, with my diploma hanging in my office,  I know those thoughts came from fear and not the reality of the situation.

As strong as those negative thoughts may be, fight through them. Talk to a trusted friend or counselor who can help you work through those fears and continue on your journey.

Join a Club or Group

Numerous groups can be found locally or online. Having a conversation with a group of people who share your same values or passion can be extremely powerful.

It is also a great space to work through challenges and setbacks with others who may have also encountered and successfully worked through them.

I hope 2023 is the start of a fantastic change in your life! Please comment if you want to share what has worked for you or what challenges you may be experiencing. I love to hear from you!

Check out the TED talk below. I think it really delves into the reasons why we don’t achieve what we say we will: